Presents

Hi Tina,
Mommy brought a package from the closet and put a few things under the tree but we know she didn't put the gifts YOU sent to us under the tree. We knew where they were and then mommy moved them again. Doesn't she realize that there is not a place good enough to hide from our noses. She put them in a closet on a higher shelf but we know they're in there. Everytime someone opens the closet, we go in, stand on our hind legs and sniff. Can't wait to see what you sent us, Tina. We know it will be good. Santa is coming soon and we hope you get all the best presents.
Love,
Macy and Sammy

Shopping and Christmas

Hi Tina,

We have never been shopping. That really sounds like fun. All we ever do is get on this computer when our mommy has it turned on. So we do all our shopping on line. It really sounds like fun to go in the car to somewhere other than the doctor or groomer. We heard our mommy say she could never take us anywhere cause we would bark. Maybe we wouldn't do that. You should see our house. There are all these trees everywhere. That means Santa is going to come soon. We are getting really excited because we have been good (well, kind of) so we know we will get lots of toys and treats. There was snow outside today so we are sure Christmas must be just around the corner.
Love,
Macy and Sammy

Holiday Shopping

Dear Friends,

Sammy, you are a hero for saving the rabbit. I would have barked my head off and probably scared it to death, especially if it was that close to my house. Good for you! You should get lots of treats for being a hero.

I have finished my holiday shopping. Went to Petco and to PetSmart. Good smells at both places. Some poor dogs were there to get groomed, but not me. Picked out presents, but I can't tell you what they are because that would ruin the surprise. I don't get this. Why can't we have our stuff now. Dogs live in the moment. Don't people get this? We don't understand "waiting." I am going to the post office today to mail the package so be on the lookout. I have to stay in the car and wait for my daddy, but I'll be sure no one steals the package while he is walking into the building. Your mommy will try to hide your presents, so you have to try to find them. Sniff hard and sniff everywhere!

We got a whole bag full of stuff at the store and I was really excited because I thought everything was for me. Then we got home and the bag went into the bedroom and the door shut. I got one treat after all that shopping. I couldn't believe it -- I was starving from sniffing everything and picking out the presents, which I thought were mine (except the bird stuff, although that smells good, too). So, all I could do was take a nap and try to regain my strength.

Oh, yeah, I got a new bustier -- big deal, you can't eat it. I hate it because it slides off my head if I pull hard. Maybe Leroy will like it. He hasn't seen me wearing it yet.

Hope you get lots of turkey in a few days. I saw one come home yesterday, so I guess it's time.

Love,
Tina

Sammy the Hero

Hi Tina,
It's me Macy. Sammy really doesn't want me to tell anyone this story, but I think you should know. One morning, last week, Sammy was being bad and not coming in from outside when our mommy called us. It was kind of early and still dark outside. I, of course, came in because I thought mommy might have something yummy for us. Well, Sammy did not come in even after our mommy called him two more times. Finally, mommy went to see where he was. First, she didn't see him out in the middle of the yard. Then she checked on one side and finally she looked on the other side. Our mommy didn't want to go down and get him so she tried to see what his problem was and why he wouldn't come in even when she yelled the "treat" word. He was just standing by a tall window well and staring at it. Then our mommy heard a like chirping sound and called our daddy. Now it was still dark and our daddy went down and peeked in the window well but he couldn't see anything. But before daddy went to work, he went downstairs and looked in the window well from inside the house. There was a bunny in the window well. So daddy ended up saving the bunny that would have died down there if Sammy hadn't stayed outside even when our mommy was getting mad at him. I think Sammy won't admit that he may have been chasing the bunny and that might be how it fell in the well - but no one will ever know for sure. Anyway, just thought you might want to brag to Leroy about how your cousin is a hero!
Love,
Macy

Why Dogs Hate Holidays!

Macy and Sammy,

Thanks for telling me that Halloween is almost here. We've had Halloween stuff all over my house for so long that I almost forgot it's there. I don't know which holiday is the worst for dogs. New Year's Day, Memorial Day, July 4th -- those are loud days with noises that sound like thunder, which is the one thing I'm really scared of. Halloween brings those scary people to the door. I get locked in the bedroom with my daddy so I don't bark myself silly or scare some little kids, who might fall down and get hurt. Even though I'm locked away, I know those monsters are at my door and that's worse than seeing them.

Then, I smell the candy, but I never get any. Sometimes I get a livasnap or some dog biscuit, when what I really want is chocolate. Even since I ate all those truffles, I want more chocolate. I figure Halloween is the best chance of that, but it hasn't happened yet.

Maybe I should get one of those costume things they have for dogs. I hear my mommy and daddy laughing at dogs who are dressed up. I wonder if a good disguise would get me some candy.

Love,
Tina

We Don't Get Trick or Treat

Hi Tina,

Wow, we haven't had a chance to get on this computer. Our mommy and daddy are busy cleaning. Something about getting ready to decorate. Our mommy is off this week and we heard her say she is going to start baking cookies. But.... we heard Halloween was coming soon. We hate Halloween - we have to bark our heads off all night long. The doorbell keeps ringing but no one ever comes in. Then we see these weird people at our door - like supermen, spidermen, tigers, and clowns Very strange night and they keep yelling "trick or treat." We never see anyone do a trick and even though we keep hearing the "treat" word - no one seems to give us anything. Sammy even does a trick and we still don't get any treat. Do you know anything about this "trick or treat" stuff?

Love,

Macy and Sammy

Fight or Flight

Macy and Sammy,

How awful for both of you that another dog was allowed in your house. I would have barked hysterically the whole time. I mean, just seeing another dog walk past my house makes me turn into Sibyl. I don't know what that is, but that's what my daddy says. He also calls me Barkula. I think that's some kind of a monster! I don't care because I don't want other dogs on my property. You should get lots of goodies after having to put up with that! Next time, don't be afraid. Walk right up to that cage and bark your head off and, while you're barking, spin around. That makes you look real serious.

I'm pretty happy these days because I see Leroy almost every night. We must be on the same walking schedule. I'm trying to send him mental signals that I will be coming outside and it's working. When he sees me, he rolls over on his back. Then, my daddy pats his tummy and I don't even get jealous. Love makes dogs do crazy things.

Love,
Tina

Scary Evening

Hi Tina,
Wow! We just have to tell you about the tramatic evening we had yesterday. All was normal - our mommy and daddy were busy cooking and getting lots of food ready for something called bridge. We were excited cause we knew that we could hang out around everyone and watch for snitches to fall on the floor. When the other people got here, there was this other dog ( we heard them say a puppy) with them that was bigger than us. Even though this "Maggie" was in a crate - we were scared to death. So much for cruising for food. We just hid behind the bar as far away as we could get from her. When everyone sat at the table to eat dinner - we walked all along the walls to get to the table - even squeezing behind chairs and going the longest way to the table. We did not want to go by that Maggie. We went outside with her one time and had to jump up on some chairs out there cause she was following us and trying to sniff us. I heard my mommy say that we need to get socialized. Hmmmmm??!! What does that mean and why were we such chickens when it was our house??!! Speaking of chicken - we could really go for some. Maybe our mommy or daddy will feel sorry for us after that crazy, scary evening and we will get a great treat tonight.
Love,
Macy and Sammy

Another Birthday

Hi Tina,
We hate when our mommy works. She is never on the computer and we just can't figure out how to turn it on by ourselves. Anyway, we are having a birthday party for our mommy's friend, Brenda. She is going to be 60 on Saturday. We heard our mommy say she is making 2 strawberry pies. Do you know if that is a good thing to eat? We are hoping that someone will remember we like birthdays and give us something to eat, too.
Love,
Macy and Sammy

Birthdays Suck

Macy, Sammy, Spencer, and MacGregor:

My mom's birthday was a bust. Everyone left and went somewhere and came home without a doggie bag, even. I got nothing, except a few of the usual liva snaps. I guess I have to wait until my birthday before I'll get some special dessert. Today, I had crust from a cherry pie. Not a bad day.

So, Macy and Sammy, I followed your advice. Last night, after my mommy and daddy left the room when dinner was over, I got up in my daddy's chair to check the table. My mommy came back and saw me. Then, she went and got my daddy. I turned my head to look out the window so they would think I got in the chair so I could protect the house better from all the threats that walk by my front yard. I 've never jumped in a chair at the table before so I wasn't sure what would happen.

They laughed at me and just let me sit in that chair. I finally got down because there was nothing on the table to eat. I'll keep trying. I know that's the place to be!

Love,
Tina

Mommys and Birthdays

Hi Tina, Spencer, and MacGregor,
We just heard it was all of our mommys' birthdays. Do you think we will get some of that delicious ice cream to celebrate. We are hoping and practicing our pitiful look. Let us know if you get anything.
Love,
Macy and Sammy

I'd Give You Something

Macy and Sammy,

If I were in charge of all the food, I would give you both something special to eat. Your picture should be on some kind of a poster that teaches dogs how to beg with dignity. I mean you are not panting, scratching on the table, or barking. You don't even have your elbows on the table and I hear that is a no-no for people. I can't believe one of you is not trying to get that box with one of your paws. I'm getting hungry just looking at that box.

Tina

P.S. Your mom did a great job posting you picture.

Wishing and Hoping

Hi Tina,
Don't you think we look sweet and innocent? Who says we don't have table manners, yet we did not get even a teeny, tiny bite!! What we can't figure out is this - when people sit at the table they ALWAYS get a round thing with something yummy on it. When we sit at the table - we get nothing! Any suggestions?
It is our bird sister's birthday - I think we may get something (like pizza) to celebrate,
Love,
Macy and Sammy

It's a Dog's Life

Here I am waiting in front of the kitchen sink for something to fall on the floor. I don't know why people have to go anywhere other than the kitchen. Why do they leave the house? They need to learn from dogs. Sleep, eat, sleep, eat, beg, bark. What else is there? My mommy is going to work next week, too. Very lonely for me and lots of waiting around for food.

Don't know why my mommy can't get this picture clearer. It doesn't look like this on the "real" picture!

Love,

Tina

What's so great about work?

Hi Tina, (Spencer and MacGregor, too)
Here's what's been happening and what is going to be happening. Yesterday, we went for a walk but we didn't see even one other dog. We were wondering what everyone was doing. Probably getting something really good to eat. We had our usually Sunday morning snacks - breakfast scrambles and crumbs from the birds. Then our mommy ALWAYS gives us chicken sticks - one for each of us. We got some new treats the other day but so far we only got one to try. Someone better remember to give us more. They had like chicken wrapped around a bone. Here is the bad news. Our mommy is going back to work tomorrow. That means we will be left all day by ourselves and we won't be able to get on the computer as much. But worse than that ---NOT as many treats!!!! When our mommy is home she gives us a treat every time we come when she calls us back in the house. Well, that won't be happening - so what we want to know is what is so great about work? Why don't these "people" just lay around and sleep and eat all day, like us?
Love,
Macy and Sammy

Thanks for your Advice

Macy and Sammy,

Thanks for your advice. I haven't seen Leroy since I last reported. I usually see him on my 6:30PM walk. I don't know where he's been. Maybe I scared him away. Then again, maybe he's left town with Lily because I haven't seen her either. I really don't care that much because I got a few tastes of chocolate chip cookies today -- no chips, just cookie, but good anyway!

Love,

Tina

P.S. MacGregor and Spencer -- Is there anything a beautiful girl dog like me can do to impress a hunk like Leroy?

Bad, Bad Leroy Brown

Hi Tina,
We had to leave our job of cruising the bird perches for potato chips crumbs to give you our advice. After looking up what a Rhodesian ridgeback looks like, we think Lily is no competition for you. You are definitely much cutier than Lily. You could make Leroy jealous by talking about all your new friends that are boys, like Spencer and MacGregor. Then try getting that new bustier and maybe a couple of bows for your hair. If that doesn't make Leroy notice you, he MUST be Bad, Bad Leroy Brown.
Love,
Macy and Sammy

P.S. At least you don't have a half brother barking and scaring all the boys away. Love, Macy

Competition in the Neighborhood

To my new friends and my cousins:

So here's the deal now. I went for a walk the other night and saw my boyfriend. Oh, yeah, I don't think I've mentioned him before. His name is Leroy and he's a bassett hound. Very good looking and the only dog I've met that I didn't want to fight. When he sees me coming up the street, he lays down and rolls over. What a wimp! That's why I like him, though, because I'm still top dog when he's around. Anyway, I saw him the other night, but this new dog, Lily, was in her driveway and she saw him, too. She's a Rhodesian ridgeback. Everybody says she's beautiful and I think Leroy thinks so, too. He ignored me and started barking at Lily and she barked back. Then, I went berserk and barked myself silly, right in front of Leroy! I think I scared him. My short-lived romance may be over. I'll keep you posted.

Love,
Tina

P.S. Went to Petco today and tried on a bunch of bustier's (harnesses in dog talk). My mommy couldn't find one she liked. Got a snack and got to sniff a bunch of good-smelling stuff.

Food vs. Toys

Hi Tina, Spencer, and MacGregor,
The only diet we know is the green bean diet. We are on the green bean diet but it doesn't sound as good as your diet, Tina. We think we would love your diet. Here it is 10:30 in the morning and we have only had a breakfast scramble, (which we had to share with the birds) 2 chicken sticks, and a few bites of apple. We are starving!!! We have been hanging out in the kitchen but that looks like all we will get. Last night, our mommy and daddy played bridge and they were busy in the kitchen all day. But here's the thing. Our mommy gave a big bag of our toys away to Emma and Buffet. We got 4 bites of chicken each. Do you think 4 bites of chicken was a fair trade for a whole bag of toys??!!!??
Love,
Macy and Sammy

Am I on a Diet?

Macy and Sammy,

I had to eat dog food today. Can you believe it? I need to figure out why I am not getting as many snacks as usual. I only had six liva snaps, one healthy edible bone, two peanut butter biscuits, four Paul Newman organic snacks for dogs, cereal with milk, peanut butter bread, carrots, mac and cheese, peas, yogurt, and a lick of a fudge bar. How is a hard-working dog like me supposed to keep up my energy with this little bit of food? I hope I haven't lost my touch. I've heard of dogs being put on diets. Please tell me that's not what's happening to me. Maybe I didn't get a lot of food today because I've been hunkered down glued to my mom in a chair because it's been thundering for hours. HELP!

Tina

Fat and Happy

Hi Tina,
It's me, Macy. Sammy is sound asleep. We are so glad our mommy is home. We get lots of those sticks in the jar when she is around. It sounds like you were treated like a princess when our mommy was there. That really sounds like fun to me. I could see being treated like a princess. I love that my mommy brought back fuzzy things that squeak. I have one on the couch with me right now. Sammy would rather have something to eat but I love my toys. So, I am happy. Here's the scoop on our friends from Scotland. They each wear a different color collar so people can tell them apart. Do you think that counts as an i.d.? I know they are very smart and so we may learn lots from them. I'm ready for a nap like Sammy so until next time...
Love,
Macy

Starving and Sad

Macy and Sammy,

I'm pretty sure your mommy is gone from here. No more of those yummy sticks from the jar and no more visits to Grandma and Grandpa's every day. So, I feel like someone has put me on a diet and I hate it! Back to the same old stuff and I have to beg again for everything instead of just show up, run in the door, and all the people fuss over me and feed me.

Sorry about the toys you got for presents. I wanted to get you food. I kept trying to go to the snack aisle, but your mommy kept looking at those fuzzy squeak toys. Then, I forgot about you anyway when I got new snacks for me!

Your mommy said you have some friends from Scotland and that they want to get in on our blog act. Can you vouch for them? I mean, do they have IDs or some way we can know if they are only interested in stealing our vast knowledge about how to swindle people out of their food. Can they be trusted?

Love and I hope I don't waste away to nothing,

Tina

Suitcases

Hi Tina,
We just want you to know that we think our mommy is going to see you soon. We saw these things called suitcases on the floor. We have seen our mommy and daddy put stuff in them and then leave for awhile. We usually get something from the suitcases when they get home. We know our mommy will bring us back something when she comes home from visiting you. Hey, maybe she will have something for you in her suitcase! You might want to look and give her that pitiful look. We hope you get some good eats while she is there and make sure you give her lots of kisses for us cause we will miss her. We won't be able to get on the computer for awhile cause our mommy will be with you and she won't have her computer on where we can get to it.
Happy Eating!
Love.
Macy and Sammy

I'll Be Waiting

Macy and Sammy,

I have been practicing pitiful so I'll be ready when your mommy gets here. We should have plenty of good things to eat. Sometimes when people visit, there is even more good food than usual and that means even more stuff ends up on the floor -- all for me. Come to think of it, I better practice picking food up off of the floor. I need to be sure I get it fast and before anyone sees me. The people will all be talking and laughing and I'll be in my own little world watching that floor. Aren't we lucky that we are small dogs and can walk under the table without anyone noticing? Can't wait to see your mommy and get a snack!

Love,

Tina

Training Humans

Hi Tina,
We think you should be rewarded for the clever way you got your daddy to save that bird. We have our mommy and daddy trained pretty well - but sometimes they mess up and forget to do what we taught them to do. Our mommy is probably trained better than our daddy. Our mommy always gives us something when she is finished eating. We just sit and look at her and then when she gets up and goes in the kitchen - we run as fast as we can, usually beating her to the kitchen. We never let her forget us. We will NOT leave the kitchen until she gives us something. Even if she forgets, and that is not alot, she will notice we are not on the couch or cruising the bird perches. Then she remembers we are still in the kitchen waiting so patiently for a snitch of something. So here's the thing.... we heard our mommy is going to be going on a trip to visit you. You can train her sooo easily. Just sit and give her that pitiful look when she's eating and we are positive she will be trained quickly to give you a snitch of something, too.
Love,
Macy and Sammy

Something is Wrong with these Birds

Macy and Sammy,

I had a crazed bird land on my windowsill a few days ago. I kept beating on the window, but the stupid thing wouldn't fly away. It was hanging on for dear life and looking right at me. Very creepy. I don't know why this bird didn't understand that this is my window, my windowsill, my street, my grass, my house, my dog bed -- I guess you get the picture. The bird was an invader into my territory.

Anyway, I banged so hard on the glass that my mommy called my daddy and he went outside and picked up the bird and put it in a tree -- one of my trees!! They said it was a baby and couldn't fly. I don't care what it was. It was in my yard and looking at me in my window.

I wish someone would give me some pizza. I didn't get any and I didn't even hurt the little bird. You could say I made so much noise that my daddy rescued it and put it back in the tree. I think I should get a reward for that and pizza would be perfect.

I don't always understand these humans we live with!

Love,
Tina

Birds and Listening

Hi Tina,
We have been having some crazy days with birds. Yesterday, when we went out in our backyard, we chased a baby bird (that could barely fly) across our yard. Well, our daddy was out with us and when he saw us chase after the bird, he really yelled at us to stop. But we didn't. So while our daddy was pushing us away from the bird, our mommy came running out of the house and we got picked up and carried back in the house. We were told we were bad because we didn't stop when our daddy told us. So tonight, we were cruising around the birds perches that live in our house because they were eating pizza. We each got a few crumbs that they dropped but then our daddy called our names and boy did we run. We can go really fast when there is food for us. We got pizza!!! Yummy!!! Why didn't our daddy realize that if he had food when he told us to stop, we would come running.
Love
Macy and Sammy

You are lucky dogs

Sammy and Macy,

I don't like those big booms either and we have a lot of them where I live too. I never get a chicken stick, though. I just get to sit close to my mommy in her big chair. I stay hunkered down until things get quiet again. Sometimes, we have these bright flashes of light before the boom. I hate those, too, because I know the light means there will be a loud noise. Yikes! There goes one now. I wish someone would give me a chicken stick to take my mind off these boomers.

Tina

Chicken Sticks

Hi Tina,
We were so glad to hear from you. We know things were crazy at your house because we heard our mommy tell our daddy about your daddy. I hope he liked the card that I picked our for him. Anyway, things have been crazy at our house, too. Sammy has been getting scared every afternoon because there are big booms outside. My mommy calls them thunderstorms. Sammy gets so scared that he tries to hide in a dark corner, usually on the landing of the stairs going to the basement or in the bathroom down there. My mommy has spent hours just sitting and petting him and telling him it will be okay. I keep dropping my ball down the stairs to them and chasing after it - I need attention, too! Yesterday, I just went down and sat beside them and my mommy petted me, too. Finally, our daddy called the doctor about Sammy and he got medicine. It is a little, white, round thing that he gets in a chicken stick. I just watch and then I get some chicken stick without the round, white thing. So here's what I'm thinking - If your daddy has medicine that he takes in a chicken stick - maybe you can watch and get a chicken stick, too!
Love,
Macy

Have You Missed Me?

Macy and Sammy,

Things have been strange around my house for a while. That's why I haven't commented about your cheese pizzas. I hope you didn't think I was mad or jealous because you get to have pizza. I get pizza sometimes, too, but mostly the crust. I'll have to find a way to get some cheese because I love cheese.

My daddy went away for a few days and there was nothing good to eat at my house and no kitchen supervision to do. It was like the kitchen was closed. But, things are looking up. My daddy is back and the kitchen is humming again. Good smells and good eats. I just finished eating half of a hard-boiled egg. Yummo!

Tina

Cheese Pizza

Hi Tina,
We heard that your grandpa gives you cheese balls. Well, guess what? We have figured out a way for our parents to give us cheese pizza. Here's what happened. One day, I guess we gave that pitiful look that you have talked about when they were eating pizza. Well, we got a bite. Our mommy and daddy couldn't believe how much we loved it. They do to, of course. Anyway, ever since that first time, everytime they eat pizza we get 5 bites a piece. Can you believe it? It is sooooo good, we only hope that you have had the chance to try it, too!
Macy and Sammy

Macy,

Sorry to hear about Sammy, but I'm sure the snack was worth the pain. The only birds we have around here are the ones that land in my front yard. I bark at them and chase them away. They are more pitiful than I am. They have no food and always seem to be looking for something to eat on the ground. They are pure entertainment for me, but they never leave anything in the yard for me to eat. And, they don't fight me -- at least, not yet. I think I need to check out where they are eating in my yard to be sure there's no food there. Never leave any stone unturned when it comes to finding a snack treasure.

Hope Sammy's tail is okay.

Tell your mommy that my mommy said there is a difference between a post and a comment and that is a new thing she has learned today. I don't care the first thing about this kind of stuff because this thing we are typing on is nowhere near the kitchen, which is my domain.

Love, Tina

Birds and Pain

Hi Tina,
Funny you should be talking about "no pain, no gain." Tonight, we were doing one of our evening rituals. We have a sister and brother that are BIRDS - you heard us correctly, at least our parents refer to them as our brother and sister. Anyway, they always get people food for dinner and we just cruise around their perches waiting for something good to fall. We have to stick close to their perches because whoever is closest when something is dropped - gets it. Sometimes, we think the birds drop food on purpose just to watch us dive for a crumb. Tonight, Sammy was NOT looking (too busy watching for food) and our sister, Lizzie, was on the bottom of her perch and reached out and bit his tail. Talk about a yelp! He's a tough guy though, he went right back to looking for food and almost got bit again. He says it is worth the bite to get a taste. Sammy would be very embarrassed if he knew I told you this story. But I think everyone should know - birds get great food!!! Hmmmm, maybe we need wings and feathers!
Love,
Macy

Macy and Sammy,

That's good advice and I'll try it. Pitiful works and so does staring with sad eyes. Sometimes I try standing real close to one of my parents in the kitchen. Only be careful, if you get too close, they step on your tail, but it's worth it. If they do step on your tail or kick you, be sure you scream or whimper even if it doesn't hurt. This is a surefire way to get a snack. I think it's called guilt. Anyway, they bend over, pat your head, scratch your ears, feel real bad, and then hand you some food. No pain, no gain. That's my motto.

Tina

Pitiful Look

Hi Tina,
We have been working on training our mom and dad. They still will NOT let us in the chairs but after they take the round things away, we just sit in the kitchen and look pitiful. That seems to work. They have been saving a bite of something from those round things for us. Sometimes, they forget about us and we just sit there until someone wonders where we are and comes looking for us. That's when we give that pitiful look and we always get something for waiting. We even heard our mom say, "Oh, how could we forget them - look how cute, they won't leave the kitchen."
Macy and Sammy

We have chair duty at our house. We are very quick to jump in a chair as soon as someone leaves the table. We sit so sweetly and yet they NEVER serve us. Why do they put round things with delicious smells in front of people when they sit nicely on a chair at the table but not us? We thought we would ask you, Tina, since you were able to eat that wonderful chocolate ganache tart. Any suggestions??

Macy and Sammy

The purloined dessert

It all started with a purloined dessert.

My name is Tina, although my parents call me a bunch of names, like "sweet T," little T," huggy, but most of the time, they call me, "The T." These are pet names, which are totally appropriate because I'm a dog. Once in a while, my parents call me Tina Louise -- only when I'm bad -- and this is ridiculous because only dogs with a pedigree have middle names and I'm a mutt.

I have a very serious job where I live. I'm in charge of the kitchen. I must respond at a moment's notice and always be alert to the most subtle changes -- like a refrigerator door opening, a drawer being pulled out, a box or bag being ripped open, something hitting the floor. I will wake up from the deepest sleep when humans tiptoe into the kitchen. They think they are sneaky and can actually get something to eat without me hearing them. But, guess what? I'm parked in front of their feet before they can get completely into the room. I supervise all meal preparation and clean-up, and, of course, watch carefully while the food is consumed.

I got serious about kitchen supervision shortly after being adopted from the Humane Society and coming to my new home. My mom and dad went outside to say goodbye to my grandparents after a visit and they left my favorite dessert sitting on the table where I could reach it. At least, it was within my grasp after I climbed on a chair and knocked the plate to the floor where I wiped out what was left of the chocolate ganache tarts. This is nirvana to a dog. If I died from a chocolote overdose, it was worth every lick.

A call to the local 24-hour veterinary hospital reassured my mommy that I wouldn't die, but I might get real sick. Well, that's for wimps and those fru-fru kinds of dogs who wear bling and paint their nails. Chocolote has no adverse effects on my health. I have a cast-iron stomach.

Anyway, this is when I got serious about kitchen supervision and I've been at it every since.

Let me introduce myself